Either I am in Love or I am Intelligent

Love or Intelligence? Heart or Brain? Have you ever felt that your heart sets back your growth professionally? Have you felt dilemma making the right decision between the heart and mind? And when the choice is made according to one, the other ridicules you if it goes wrong later. The conflict between the two is never ending. Everybody is expected to make wise decisions, but wise is always brain, then what about heart? What is the definition of a wise decision? Here are few suggestions with which we can train ourselves to make wise real life decisions.

Set your Content Driver

I read the following quote and the questioned myself "Will I be happy like that"? Or Can someone be happy like that?

"I am too intelligent, too demanding, and too resourceful for anyone to be able to take charge of me entirely. No one knows me or loves me completely. I have only myself” 
― Simone de Beauvoir

Then I answered that living this way is not my cup of coffee, but I know my friend who is very happy being in same feet as mentioned in above quote.

I believe one should do what makes thy content, satisfied and finally happy. After all, we all are mature and grown up adults and we should learn to take responsibility of what we do. We know finally that it is our choice and the responsibility for the results are ours. The decision for a similar situation offers different levels of contentness to different people. For example, women are more pleased with the word 'Sale' or 'Shopping' than men. Of course, other demand drivers like income, age, societal status, standard of living, ancestral background, habits, etc are determining factors of the individual buying behavior. Thus, every individual has their own criteria for defining their levels of Content.

The previous example indicates to the Gender Performativity theory of philosopher Judith Butler.  For example, two of my students Manick and Ronald, were offered an international placement in one of the Big five companies. Both joined (being intelligent), performed very decently over first six months but thereafter Manick outshined Ronald. Being their former mentor, I explored and found that Ronald felt home sickness, and he could not adjust and he came back to his home country (being in Love). Manick have always been an ambitious student, thus, that worked as his 'Content Driver'; Ronald, on other hand, has been ambitious but was more content living near his dear ones, thus that was his 'Content Driver'. I enquired henceforth after an year, Manick was doing very well in his position, was promoted and was happy. Ronald found a good job in his country and was happy with his family and work balance.

Build high on ethics and intrinsic values

Content drivers should be aligned with the intrinsic values and ethics as well. The reason for building on your ethics and values is to distinguish between right and wrong. Intrinsic values and ethics are not built in a day. The experiences, upbringing, socio-cultural environment formulate these values and ethics.

Alignment of content driver with intrinsic values and ethics will help distinguish between good and bad decisions. At least the decision should be socially acceptable.

For example, one of my colleagues had always been stealing office stationary. Who would not like to get free benefits, but is this decision feasible? It may give her content at first, but she faced a lot of embarrassment later when it was disclosed to the management. Even this led to loss of her job. Had she thought of being ethical, she would have saved herself from the situation for such petty reason.

Think forward for blacks and whites

"I don't believe in taking right decisions. I take decisions and then make them right"  Ratan Naval Tata.

What is the definition of right or wrong? What is right for one may be wrong for others. The only effort is to foresee possible results and choose the one where you can be prepared for the worst.

We should train ourselves to think forward for both black and white results. Black here refers to worst scenario and white refers to best scenario. Of course, the hidden motivation behind our decisions are whites; although we should analyze and be prepared for the black as well.

Conclusively, I would say that heart and mind go hand in hand. Build high on your intrinsic values and be prepared for the worst and then decide what makes you content.